我是一個會在愛情路上不斷否定自己的人：想得太多、給伴侶加太多麻煩、不時在重要一刻逃避…
但神就是清楚祂所造的兒女，讓我遇到從沒碰過如此有耐性的人，拒絕我一而再再而三的分手或放棄的建議。
×××
最近我發現了自己好多又大又小的洞，又一而再再而三地被提醒自己是是他也是你和我的罪人，幸好男朋友同時提醒了我神無盡的愛，若不，我會一路崩潰並不能接受自己下去。
好好學習愛吧，這是一生的功課，眼前已有實踐愛的對象，記住要好好珍惜。
Sun 8 Oct 21:10
2017年10月8日 星期日
2017年10月7日 星期六
A
Still, I feel like this is a dream, happening in real life.
To be honest, I still can't understand why there's a man on earth feel lucky to meet me and have me in his life. From time to time, I wonder, what can I provide to my boyfriend? Religious? Maybe. In real life? I am not sure. I mean, I do know there are smth good inside me but smth bad at the same time. But he, really does embrace me so far... How ridiculous is it? Like the real, 100% me. The talkative side, the overthinking side, the over-stressful side, the mean side. He spends his time on me, on me.
Tbh I am kinda scared about the feeling of 'seems like dreaming' cos I always think like bad thing will come right after that... That's why I am used to not to have any expectations but more communication instead.
I think a lot, probably too much for a human. I digest a lot, at the same time share smth not really simple - a bit complicated.
***
Written in June, a few days after we got into relationship :p
To be honest, I still can't understand why there's a man on earth feel lucky to meet me and have me in his life. From time to time, I wonder, what can I provide to my boyfriend? Religious? Maybe. In real life? I am not sure. I mean, I do know there are smth good inside me but smth bad at the same time. But he, really does embrace me so far... How ridiculous is it? Like the real, 100% me. The talkative side, the overthinking side, the over-stressful side, the mean side. He spends his time on me, on me.
Tbh I am kinda scared about the feeling of 'seems like dreaming' cos I always think like bad thing will come right after that... That's why I am used to not to have any expectations but more communication instead.
I think a lot, probably too much for a human. I digest a lot, at the same time share smth not really simple - a bit complicated.
***
Written in June, a few days after we got into relationship :p
2017年10月5日 星期四
Back again / Oct 6
I come back when I feel like coming back.
I have to admit that there're a few times I would like to push myself to write something here to speed up my pace to grow or to understand something faster to catch up my own schedule. But then, till now, I realised that there are lot of things especially - growth, we have no ability to control. The more we interrupt the progress, the longer we will take. And I believe that's a smart lesson to have in our life time to figure out the important of "hands off" in some situations but not to push ourselves to do more than we should do :) I count all these as a smart act in life as well.
I came back to Hong Kong on the 4th Aug and started working on 7th Aug. So tomorrow will be my 2nd month anniversary of my job. To be honest, I didn't give myself enough of time to immerse in the city before I started working, so I basically just let myself to get used to different situations and different groups along the way. And when I looked back recently, I think I have done a pretty good job by changing the way I think and the way I set my goals to myself - to change the unreachable goals and replaced it by a more achievable one, which at the same time allowing myself to breathe but not to rush till the end (tho there's no end tbh).
Adult life just hit me with no notice before head. Recall the last two months in spent in Nottingham or the Europe, I remember I did try to give myself some mental preparation about stepping into the society which I could foresee lots of challenges and temptations. However, this made me realised that no matter how hard we tried to prepare for something, it would not be enough or would be imperfect. It may even be useless. One lesson I learnt from it is that we should always lift our worries and burdens to our God and hands off. This is a matter a faith I guess. And like Adrian always said, it doesn't help to think too much or to guess what will happen too much at the moment as we are going to encounter that anyways. So why should we put all these in front of ourselves before the things actually hit us so hard?
Oh my, I can't tell how huge this man is to be the gift from God in my life. He changes how I think and make me into a better person. :)
***
The devotion this morning doesn't really hit me that hard, but to inspire me to realise what's the lesson given by God in these few months or even this year - to be patient.
No matter in getting used to the working life, the whole long distance relationship period, to do better in each tasks in work place, etc. I just realised how much patience I need to get through all these and to get all this done. Oh wait, I have to remind myself I should always have a mindset that things will just keep rolling, there's no 'done' in the coming days and years.
"When you are tired, learn to rest but not to quit" - such a quote that appear in the middle of my hard time last month to keep me going. God always remember us and know what we are going through. He knows. Be still and know my dear.
Oct 6 13:26 at home, didn't go to work
I have to admit that there're a few times I would like to push myself to write something here to speed up my pace to grow or to understand something faster to catch up my own schedule. But then, till now, I realised that there are lot of things especially - growth, we have no ability to control. The more we interrupt the progress, the longer we will take. And I believe that's a smart lesson to have in our life time to figure out the important of "hands off" in some situations but not to push ourselves to do more than we should do :) I count all these as a smart act in life as well.
I came back to Hong Kong on the 4th Aug and started working on 7th Aug. So tomorrow will be my 2nd month anniversary of my job. To be honest, I didn't give myself enough of time to immerse in the city before I started working, so I basically just let myself to get used to different situations and different groups along the way. And when I looked back recently, I think I have done a pretty good job by changing the way I think and the way I set my goals to myself - to change the unreachable goals and replaced it by a more achievable one, which at the same time allowing myself to breathe but not to rush till the end (tho there's no end tbh).
Adult life just hit me with no notice before head. Recall the last two months in spent in Nottingham or the Europe, I remember I did try to give myself some mental preparation about stepping into the society which I could foresee lots of challenges and temptations. However, this made me realised that no matter how hard we tried to prepare for something, it would not be enough or would be imperfect. It may even be useless. One lesson I learnt from it is that we should always lift our worries and burdens to our God and hands off. This is a matter a faith I guess. And like Adrian always said, it doesn't help to think too much or to guess what will happen too much at the moment as we are going to encounter that anyways. So why should we put all these in front of ourselves before the things actually hit us so hard?
Oh my, I can't tell how huge this man is to be the gift from God in my life. He changes how I think and make me into a better person. :)
***
The devotion this morning doesn't really hit me that hard, but to inspire me to realise what's the lesson given by God in these few months or even this year - to be patient.
No matter in getting used to the working life, the whole long distance relationship period, to do better in each tasks in work place, etc. I just realised how much patience I need to get through all these and to get all this done. Oh wait, I have to remind myself I should always have a mindset that things will just keep rolling, there's no 'done' in the coming days and years.
"When you are tired, learn to rest but not to quit" - such a quote that appear in the middle of my hard time last month to keep me going. God always remember us and know what we are going through. He knows. Be still and know my dear.
Oct 6 13:26 at home, didn't go to work
2017年6月16日 星期五
旅行的意義
旅行的意義是在於發掘和經歷一些從沒見識過、感受過的地方、人和文化。
其實重要的，是 你 怎樣理解這個國家這個城市，並不在於世界和朋輩認為你 應該 怎樣去理解她。你可以喜歡柏林因爲她能給予你一種「時間都停頓了」的感覺。亦可以不喜歡巴黎因為每一種交通公具（特別是underground）都有著只有巴黎人才能忍受的臭味和尿味。在現實中，其實有哪一個人能頂得順像照片中在臭到死的塞納河河邊閱讀，又或者從撐gondola的人的口中了解威尼斯。
在二十一世紀，我們特別容易讓傳媒及自己的期望支配了整個旅行和各種經歷。我們很容易將頭腦所認知和理解的畫面在旅行時實現出來，把別人去過的旅行畫面及感受過的感覺在地球上從頭至尾再做多一次，然後在自己個人跟那個地方就沒有建立到任何關係的情況下就離開了那個城市或地方。當然，我從不會為有人去過巴黎後，真心覺得Montmartre的斜路很浪漫而感到驚訝。只是認為，被傳媒及別人的理解而限制了自己對一個地方的認識和經歷有點可惜。
然而，期望這回事，我們都沒可能完全沒有，所以個人擁有著「其實自己對 _ _ _ 有著某種期望」的認知就很重要。跳出特定的旅遊畫面，讓自己在橫街直巷亂行，重要的是不要把日程表填得密密麻麻，給予自己自由和時間讓那個地方那個城市用她的步伐走到你眼前。
不要把旅行定型成一種浪漫／壯麗／改變人生的一件事。勇敢去承認在旅行中所有的情緒 — 快樂、放鬆、憤怒、疲累，甚至發現原來那個城市就是不能帶給你甚麼感覺，就只有淡淡的，然後旅程就完了。好好去做一個訪客（因為在短期的到訪都不能成為真正的當地人），不要把一個新地方新城市屈就於我們的preconceptions，不要容許自己的期望抹煞了旅行的意義。
有一套電影，我不時翻看，叫The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (2013)，裏面嘅Sean O'Connell有一句 "Beautiful things don't ask for attention"。
究竟，你係係度好努力咁睇緊呢個世界，定係好努力咁讓呢個「世界」睇到你呢？
2017年6月5日 星期一
2017年6月4日 星期日
穿越孤單 只能讓空白擁抱我 | 睜開了眼 明天會美麗
一定要相信自己 Trust Myself
詞：討海人
曲：鍾成虎、盧廣仲、陳綺貞
製作人：鍾成虎
一定要相信自己 儘管他們不看好
一定要相信自己
一定要說服自己 儘管沒有人相信
一定要說服自己
今天過去 今天過去
就讓我輕輕睡去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
今天過去 今天過去 疼痛會過去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
狂風吹了 大雨灑落
擁抱什麼 堅持什麼
穿越孤單 只能讓空白擁抱我
今天過去 今天過去
就讓我輕輕睡去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
今天過去 今天過去 疼痛會過去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
Mon 5 Jun 00:44
詞：討海人
曲：鍾成虎、盧廣仲、陳綺貞
製作人：鍾成虎
一定要相信自己 儘管他們不看好
一定要相信自己
一定要說服自己 儘管沒有人相信
一定要說服自己
今天過去 今天過去
就讓我輕輕睡去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
今天過去 今天過去 疼痛會過去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
狂風吹了 大雨灑落
擁抱什麼 堅持什麼
穿越孤單 只能讓空白擁抱我
今天過去 今天過去
就讓我輕輕睡去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
今天過去 今天過去 疼痛會過去
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
睜開了眼 明天會美麗
Mon 5 Jun 00:44
2017年5月15日 星期一
Daddy, you are just so amazing
God's way is higher than us.
Yesterday night, I was stunned by the fact that I become a British Citizen in just a day.
In the past few months, I started counting down. From time to time, unintentionally. I give thanks that I could have this chance to come to the UK to continue my undergrad degree here in Nottingham. This is already more than I could ever ask for. Two years, it's not a long period but not short at the same time. I thought that life in Nottingham is coming to the end unless I would like to get my master in the future. But I know that would be different as people change, time change and my mentality will change as well. More, I know that that will come to an end much faster as my master should be lasting for a year only. Therefore, I know that I got lots of thoughts from time to time, popping up in my mind thinking what and where would I be in the future. However, I didn't expect this would be my option - to stay in the UK whenever I want... (kind of)
It's like going back to the time my mum told me I could have the chance to go to the UK to study. That's like a dream as I thought that's something far away and I didn't expect I got this options in life. And this time, again, that's exactly that kind of feeling. But maybe something more than that... Crazy. All I can say is - really, we can never know what God will give and take but for sure we will be surprised by His grace and supply.
God again reminds me, He cares about my attitude and intention more than anything.
When I applied for the renewal, I told myself that staying here for extra two years are more than enough for myself. To do something I like at the same time to explore more. I didn't expect things would turn out this way - God gives me another choice.
To be honest, my heart feels much relieved. Not because that I could live as aimless and plain as I want to be but see the grace and power of God. If God allows you to do something. He would make a way. Tho I am not sure whether this is the sign from God but I would definitely give it a try until God tells me to go to another place. How great is our God?
Keep praying. Keep praying for His guidance. At the same time, keep walking in His way and immerse in His words and teaching. God will never disappointed us so we should not be disappointed by any hardship as well!
Mon 15 May 14:26
Yesterday night, I was stunned by the fact that I become a British Citizen in just a day.
In the past few months, I started counting down. From time to time, unintentionally. I give thanks that I could have this chance to come to the UK to continue my undergrad degree here in Nottingham. This is already more than I could ever ask for. Two years, it's not a long period but not short at the same time. I thought that life in Nottingham is coming to the end unless I would like to get my master in the future. But I know that would be different as people change, time change and my mentality will change as well. More, I know that that will come to an end much faster as my master should be lasting for a year only. Therefore, I know that I got lots of thoughts from time to time, popping up in my mind thinking what and where would I be in the future. However, I didn't expect this would be my option - to stay in the UK whenever I want... (kind of)
It's like going back to the time my mum told me I could have the chance to go to the UK to study. That's like a dream as I thought that's something far away and I didn't expect I got this options in life. And this time, again, that's exactly that kind of feeling. But maybe something more than that... Crazy. All I can say is - really, we can never know what God will give and take but for sure we will be surprised by His grace and supply.
God again reminds me, He cares about my attitude and intention more than anything.
When I applied for the renewal, I told myself that staying here for extra two years are more than enough for myself. To do something I like at the same time to explore more. I didn't expect things would turn out this way - God gives me another choice.
To be honest, my heart feels much relieved. Not because that I could live as aimless and plain as I want to be but see the grace and power of God. If God allows you to do something. He would make a way. Tho I am not sure whether this is the sign from God but I would definitely give it a try until God tells me to go to another place. How great is our God?
Keep praying. Keep praying for His guidance. At the same time, keep walking in His way and immerse in His words and teaching. God will never disappointed us so we should not be disappointed by any hardship as well!
Mon 15 May 14:26
2017年5月13日 星期六
「溫度」這回事
其實我挺在乎生命中遇上的人事物有沒有「溫度」這回事 —— 一個地方、一個人、一段文字。頭一兩次到訪，都有機會被新鮮感遮蓋了那感受溫度的能力。但到訪過幾次見過幾次讀過幾次後，新鮮感續漸散去，剩下的就是那只有你才能讓人感受到的溫暖。
我認為一個人所擁有和能發出的溫度好重要，很吸引。因為你可以輕易地透過行動和說話去表達自己，去讓別人去認識一個「你想別人這樣詮釋你」的自己，但每人的雙眼卻是最直接最騙不到人。很多人都錯失了雙眼所能發出的溫度，那種真實不做作的溫暖和熟悉感。下一次，試試花點留意身邊人的雙眼，你會發現很多他們不會亦不懂用言語去表達的想法和感受。
#倫敦就是一個對我來說不能發出溫度的城市 #每次只想快快的來快快的去
2017年5月8日 星期一
2017年5月7日 星期日
Congrats :)
Congrats to the girl who sometimes would feel like to fit into the mainstream but at last you just can't do it cos you are too comfortable in your own skins and you know that the best way to treat yourself good is to be honest and be yourself :) You are surely heading somewhere!
2017年5月3日 星期三
2017年5月1日 星期一
SPOILED KID
Looking back and looking around in the apartment I am living at the moment, memories flushed back in my mind. Pushing me to count my blessings in the past two years.
1. The opportunity to study in UoN.
2. Chances to travel around the U.K. and Europe in a young age.
3. Supportive family especially my lovely parents who give me much freedom in the past 2 years :')
4. Break down and build up by God, keep growing in His love and words through serving Him at the same time.
5. Met lots of lovely and genuine friends in life. (Ashluk, Michael Chan, Agatha, Holam, Henry, Alistair, Martinyiu, Marcolam, Sabi, etc)
6. Has been through a lot of ups and downs. Through all these, I am equipped in different aspects.
7. Have the time, space and platform to spend time with myself and to understand myself more and more. Both good and bad. But still, precious moments in life.
8. Explore. To work and get along with people come from different countries and cultural background.
9. Time to take a deeper yet closer step towards God, my father papa in life.
10. Realised the importance and beauty of love :)
11.
<Not yet done, still counting>
1. The opportunity to study in UoN.
2. Chances to travel around the U.K. and Europe in a young age.
3. Supportive family especially my lovely parents who give me much freedom in the past 2 years :')
4. Break down and build up by God, keep growing in His love and words through serving Him at the same time.
5. Met lots of lovely and genuine friends in life. (Ashluk, Michael Chan, Agatha, Holam, Henry, Alistair, Martinyiu, Marcolam, Sabi, etc)
6. Has been through a lot of ups and downs. Through all these, I am equipped in different aspects.
7. Have the time, space and platform to spend time with myself and to understand myself more and more. Both good and bad. But still, precious moments in life.
8. Explore. To work and get along with people come from different countries and cultural background.
9. Time to take a deeper yet closer step towards God, my father papa in life.
10. Realised the importance and beauty of love :)
11.
<Not yet done, still counting>
You show me your words at the right timing
So I opened the 'Daily Bread' App I downloaded long time ago today. I didn't use that even I have downloaded that app ages ago. Then I read Joshua 1, I am touched by how good You are fatherpapa :)
I still remember the months I spent adapting the life in UK, mostly spending time alone in my studio in Broadgate Park. I didn't have many friends and couldn't fit in in the lectures as they knew each other the year before and they had their own group. I spent time to know who am I in order to understand and get to know myself more and more.
And I can still remember the day Manyi shared this post to me and your words comforted me. "...for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." - at that point, I am getting better and I am able to look back and see your grace and work in my life. How amazing you are, God.
/
Two days before, I had dinner, prayed and shared w/ Charlie and Marco. When they asked me how's life, I am not quite sure about that. I couldn't describe or express my feeling in an exact way... Probably because my schedule was too tight - UKECC, SEEC, trip to Greece and Albania, back before Ashluk left Nottingham, straight back to my dissertation (which I am not good at working on it)... Probably they are the reasons. Or just - I am trying to accept the fact that I am leaving this familiar place and going back to Hong Kong in 3 months.
However, You know me too well. You show me your words and grace.
Thanks God, May all the glory lifted to you.
我不是吩咐過你要堅強勇敢嗎？所以，你不要懼怕，也不要驚慌；因為你無論到哪裡去，耶和華你的 神必與你同在。」約書亞記 1:9
Mon 1 May 17:34
2017年4月28日 星期五
Expenses Excel
Just feel like writing my first expenses diary on Excel, so I did it. However, it is one of the most breath-taking thing I have ever done as when I was writing and looking back on my expenses per month, I almost want to puke. The stress of managing money is real and kind of shit. However, as one of my feet is in the zone of the world of adulthood, I can't not push myself to manage the money in my hands in a better way.
I believe this is one of the 'I don't want to do but I know I have to so I do it' things in life that will keep going no matter how much I earn in the future. It's a painful experience. Even now I have completed my first draft of my expenses excel, I still feel so stressed managing and counting even pounds and bit. However, I believe that the more regularly I work on it, the better I will feel (or I will just get used to it).
This is such a random yet important note for myself. One step closer to a dream mature young-adult life. Painful yet necessary. Need wisdom from God to manage all the tiny and huge things in my life. Phew. You can do it ccl. It's a challenge that makes you a better, wise and organised lady :)
Fri 28 Apr 14:16
I believe this is one of the 'I don't want to do but I know I have to so I do it' things in life that will keep going no matter how much I earn in the future. It's a painful experience. Even now I have completed my first draft of my expenses excel, I still feel so stressed managing and counting even pounds and bit. However, I believe that the more regularly I work on it, the better I will feel (or I will just get used to it).
This is such a random yet important note for myself. One step closer to a dream mature young-adult life. Painful yet necessary. Need wisdom from God to manage all the tiny and huge things in my life. Phew. You can do it ccl. It's a challenge that makes you a better, wise and organised lady :)
Fri 28 Apr 14:16
2017年4月22日 星期六
22
22, it seems so close and so far that it just slips away from me so I am officially 22 now. An interesting picture is now happening in front of me: Pooh is sleeping on the right hand side, Charlie is lying on the bed with his typical 'man's gesture', Henry is hea-ing and surfing on his phone next to Charlie with his facial-less face while Adrian is working on the sofa bench with me. This picture is funny enough to note it down because it's causal and realistic. We are all human like we got work to finish, we chill and we sleep. We are special but at the same time we got many similarities in life. Learn to appreciate, keep on figuring out the pretty weird face and expression of different people. These bring life a little smile unexpectedly.
This should be the most chill and aimless birthday I have ever had. No burden when travelling with the men and no surprises at the same time. However, this doesn't mean much to me cos from time to time, birthday becomes just a day. Nothing fancy makes life real and much easy to appreciate. We have spent the whole morning travelling from Corfu to Albania. Tho dissertation does pop up in my head from time to time, I am trying my best to enjoy the trip without worrying too much. However, my planning habit just can't stop as I have a responsibility that has not yet accomplished.
However, there are a few questions that I would like to ask myself to make this 'birthday' a little bit meaningful. Hahah yea, you know what I mean. The society just frames that birthday should be unforgettable or at least a little special which included quality talk or deep sharing. However, I haven't really figured out what I want on my birthday to add a little more happiness on my day. What kind of tradition I would like to keep or add on my birthday in order to make myself to feel satisfied? What is simple happiness to me? It's like 'I don't want to celebrate birthday' or it's just I haven't found my way to celebrate my birthday?
Besides, I would like to set 1 to 2 goals for myself in the coming year. I would like to build a few habits to consolidate my life. First thing first, I have to catch up with my dissertation schedule as it's quite behind.
Sat 22 April 22:28 at Albania w/ 4 guys
This should be the most chill and aimless birthday I have ever had. No burden when travelling with the men and no surprises at the same time. However, this doesn't mean much to me cos from time to time, birthday becomes just a day. Nothing fancy makes life real and much easy to appreciate. We have spent the whole morning travelling from Corfu to Albania. Tho dissertation does pop up in my head from time to time, I am trying my best to enjoy the trip without worrying too much. However, my planning habit just can't stop as I have a responsibility that has not yet accomplished.
However, there are a few questions that I would like to ask myself to make this 'birthday' a little bit meaningful. Hahah yea, you know what I mean. The society just frames that birthday should be unforgettable or at least a little special which included quality talk or deep sharing. However, I haven't really figured out what I want on my birthday to add a little more happiness on my day. What kind of tradition I would like to keep or add on my birthday in order to make myself to feel satisfied? What is simple happiness to me? It's like 'I don't want to celebrate birthday' or it's just I haven't found my way to celebrate my birthday?
Besides, I would like to set 1 to 2 goals for myself in the coming year. I would like to build a few habits to consolidate my life. First thing first, I have to catch up with my dissertation schedule as it's quite behind.
Sat 22 April 22:28 at Albania w/ 4 guys
2017年4月17日 星期一
你在哪裡
作詞：林若寧
作曲：石嘉欣
編曲：石嘉欣
沒有愛情對白那套杜魯福 可以與誰觀看
沒有愛情帶路坐上橫濱線 問我共誰流浪
沒有愛情喝下那罐熱咖啡 可以替誰解渴
懷內每句話 誰肯聽聽我講
踏破鐵鞋你在哪裡為我等 給我半滴戀愛
踏破鐵鞋你在哪裡未知道 就似未曾存在
踏破鐵鞋我在這裡為你等 仿似競技比賽
尋覓太過耐 連愛亦變傷害
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
最後迎接有情人的一吻
習慣了獨個在四處亂碰釘 感覺愛情很遠
習慣了獨個在暗角祈禱也 未見我能如願
習慣了獨個為某個人暗戀 只有拼命打轉
尋覓到厭倦 誰兌現我心願
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
除非褫奪去愛的資格
仍自信有日誰會為我表白
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
最後迎接有情人的一吻
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFkDpfzva7o
作曲：石嘉欣
編曲：石嘉欣
沒有愛情對白那套杜魯福 可以與誰觀看
沒有愛情帶路坐上橫濱線 問我共誰流浪
沒有愛情喝下那罐熱咖啡 可以替誰解渴
懷內每句話 誰肯聽聽我講
踏破鐵鞋你在哪裡為我等 給我半滴戀愛
踏破鐵鞋你在哪裡未知道 就似未曾存在
踏破鐵鞋我在這裡為你等 仿似競技比賽
尋覓太過耐 連愛亦變傷害
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
最後迎接有情人的一吻
習慣了獨個在四處亂碰釘 感覺愛情很遠
習慣了獨個在暗角祈禱也 未見我能如願
習慣了獨個為某個人暗戀 只有拼命打轉
尋覓到厭倦 誰兌現我心願
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
除非褫奪去愛的資格
仍自信有日誰會為我表白
除非我沒有動人成份
何必怕沒有交出初吻
看著時間過 但唯有我
在尋遍每位路人
明知道未到動人時份
才等到頭上燈泡轉暗
寄望還會有位路人 清楚我亦蠻吸引
繼續迷信有情人多麼近
最後迎接有情人的一吻
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFkDpfzva7o
2017年4月8日 星期六
轉載:
人總是在長大了以後常常聽見「莫忘初衷」這一句話，但好聽的話人人會說，初衷也許人人都有，真正堅持到最後的又有幾個？或者，其實已經忘記了自己曾經的堅持。暫時不討論關於追逐夢想，堅持信念這類的話題，我想說的初衷，是每個人生來具有的溫柔善良。
不要因為這世界的不美好 抹滅了自己的善良
在十幾歲的年紀裡，我們眼中的世界還那麼大，那麼多事情想要靠自己一一去探索，想做的事情太多，也許還認為這個世界是全然美好的，只要妳肯相信。但在那麼年輕的時候，這世界又能給妳什麼傷害？那時候的妳期望自己一直做個溫柔的人，對這個世界溫柔就也會有溫柔的事情發生在自己身上。但長大了就知道，一直保持那樣的溫柔不變，真是不容易。
妳會在以後碰到很多無法理解但只能接受的事情，妳會從妳以為永遠不會這樣對妳的人身上受到傷害，妳會被欺負，也會被辜負。妳以為妳對那個人好他就會珍惜，然後妳就知道其實不是的，他終究愛自己多一點。妳以為的事情很多，但最後都不是妳以為的結果，漸漸的妳會學會謙虛。妳也許會做很多種工作，然後就知道妳自己最喜歡什麼。妳也會去很多地方，完成妳想要探索這個世界的夢想，然後發現這個世界的美好仍然存在。妳會認識很多人，不管好壞都教會妳許多事情，妳面對傷害也越能調適，雖然還是有快要崩潰的時刻，但還有更多人的存在，證明這世界的美好，證明妳一直以來相信的溫柔其實可以被珍惜。
所以長大了以後才發現，溫柔不是天份而是一種選擇。再不合理的傷害，再令人灰心的關係，還是可以選擇良善。雖然這個世界有他的不完美與陰暗，但妳還是要溫柔善良，不要因為世界的不公，失去了純真的自己。畢竟還沒有受過傷害以前，比較不出溫柔的珍貴。
莫忘初衷，莫忘初衷，莫要忘了那個，最美好的自己。
2017年4月6日 星期四
It happened | Woke at 8ish | we three and God
We shared a lot again :) It's a gift from God that I met you two in my two-year uni life. Didn't expect that we could be that devoted or serious when we are facing God and what we are believing.
We talk about the struggle we faced when we try to wake up in the early morning while didn't go to bed earlier the night before...
2017年4月4日 星期二
2017年3月30日 星期四
The man sitting on the left front side of mine at the Hub
There's a man sitting right in front of me having his lunch. He is just too conscious about what he is eating. He just focus on what he eats. Without scrolling throught Facebook or Instagram. Just on one single thing. Since when we starts to multitask every single thing in life? We talk when we are using the social media, we eat while watching Youtube, we listen to music while we are walking down the street. We just get used to it and would like to maximize our time and complete as much task as we can. Yes, it's cool to be productive, but still we are missing out the joy to work on one single thing. How about... One thing at a time? 專注的人特別美 - here's the phrase I love and agree a lot. I know it's impossible to tell you to work on just one thing every second but hey, try, try to work on one thing at a time. Try to enjoy your meal without being distracted by the social media, try to workout without listening to music, try to talk while looking into people's eyes. Try, just try.
Thu 30 Mar 12:46pm
Thu 30 Mar 12:46pm
2017年3月28日 星期二
想得太遠
作曲：陳輝陽
填詞：林夕
編曲：陳輝陽
大慨這算是迷戀
這路程得幾分鐘真是太短
大慨你都想 去後樂園
卻怕孤單一個人兜圈
誰人在挑選 如何被挑選
如何教我結識你怎麼相戀
為何坐到那麼近 卻想得這樣遠
人浪為何會流轉
*若幸運一點一早找到你
但幸運可否擔保得到你
就望著際遇鋪展我的天與地
願錯亦錯得起
若命運叫我只懂喜歡你
但願亦有幸懂得留住你
如若過去我太在乎 相遇別離 請准我預備
從來未吻你 卻已學懂去被忘記
憑什麼可以愛上所愛
我自問日夜等待
結局為何揭不開
等緣份 信緣份
我們只好相信 下集定是更精彩
大慨你正在回想
與別人剛剛分手剛受過傷
從前伴侶碰不見
你我偏可遇上
人寂寞便愛幻想
*
憑什麼可以愛上所愛
我自問日夜等待
結局為何揭不開
等緣份 信緣份
我們只好相信 來來回回難避開
若命運叫我只懂喜歡你
但願亦有幸懂得留住你
如若過去我太在乎 相遇別離 請准我預備
仍然未識你 卻已幻想那份驚喜
填詞：林夕
編曲：陳輝陽
大慨這算是迷戀
這路程得幾分鐘真是太短
大慨你都想 去後樂園
卻怕孤單一個人兜圈
誰人在挑選 如何被挑選
如何教我結識你怎麼相戀
為何坐到那麼近 卻想得這樣遠
人浪為何會流轉
*若幸運一點一早找到你
但幸運可否擔保得到你
就望著際遇鋪展我的天與地
願錯亦錯得起
若命運叫我只懂喜歡你
但願亦有幸懂得留住你
如若過去我太在乎 相遇別離 請准我預備
從來未吻你 卻已學懂去被忘記
憑什麼可以愛上所愛
我自問日夜等待
結局為何揭不開
等緣份 信緣份
我們只好相信 下集定是更精彩
大慨你正在回想
與別人剛剛分手剛受過傷
從前伴侶碰不見
你我偏可遇上
人寂寞便愛幻想
*
憑什麼可以愛上所愛
我自問日夜等待
結局為何揭不開
等緣份 信緣份
我們只好相信 來來回回難避開
若命運叫我只懂喜歡你
但願亦有幸懂得留住你
如若過去我太在乎 相遇別離 請准我預備
仍然未識你 卻已幻想那份驚喜
2017年3月27日 星期一
去火星戀愛
編曲：舒文
監製：舒文
蒞臨朋友聚會 欣賞到恩愛示範
你有人陪 我卻沒有份 一片平淡
好心問我 找不到男朋友 怎麼可習慣
尷尬地說 寧願將工作一天排到晚
謝謝關心 知我 永沒有驚喜
自問不怎麼醜 孤獨無道理
最怕我父母 追問我婚期
循例作答 沒有機
朋友太多 為甚麼失戀要附和或要哭
總是預我 我夠姊妺 最後你倆言和
為何還談論復康經過
我喜歡我 惋惜有用麼 便能得救麼
找遍全球不果 就在火星觀察看為 誰容訥我
人來人往 日夜奔波 都嚮往浪漫
我再繁忙 我再沒有空 總有期限
不必問我 找不到男朋友 怎麼可習慣
快說服我 遲些初戀 至可心甜到晚
但是通通都當我是個知己
越是心急偏不出現才合理
我也渴望有轟烈兩星期
誰話我已沒有棋
朋友太多 為甚麼失戀要附和或要哭
總是預我 我夠姊妺 最後你倆言和
為何還談論復康經過
我喜歡我 傷心有用麼 便能得救麼
找遍全球不果 去到火星戀愛 我便會拍拖
手鬆點 可不可 避免每次節慶也得一個
情敵 就在附近 也許都開心過 跟公仔同座
朋友太多 為甚麼失戀要附和或要哭
一定預我 我最得體 我認至會難明
全球男孩為什麼閃過
看清楚我 真的怪異麼 不算可愛麼
走到火星談情
愛我的一位會過來陪伴我
讓我知 上帝原來庇佑我
2017年3月25日 星期六
Sunny Day | Good Mood | Cherry blossom
Woke up, Make up, Coffee at Outpost, Tram to Highfield Park, Cherry Blossem, Endless photo takings, back home, go to Henry's for lunch, Gym - 30 mins aka 4km run (simply yet feeling refresh every single time), shower, nap (didn't expect tho lol), Kebab & instant noodles dinner at ours, chill, work.
It's the precious time in younghood.
Best day ever. xxx
Sun 26 Mar 03:52am
2017年3月16日 星期四
The day after the 'meeting' w/ head of department
'Things are usually not as scary as you thought or imagine in your 'overthinking mind'.
Glad that things are over. (Should be) And I hope that by drawing the line on this case, there's nothing I have to worry and work on the same thing again before my graduation. In the past weeks, I have as much thoughts and ideas as I could have. I overthought a lot. Couldn't have a proper, stressless sleep. However, I learnt a huge lesson or like a serval lessons throughout the whole case.
1. It's better working my whole ass on something without relying on people too much or to let them to do my job, and to get a grade or reward that I deserve to have.
2. To be honest to myself, to God, to the Holy Spirit.
3. 若要人不知，除非己莫為。漢·枚乘 《上書諫吳王》
4. Friends. The meaning or the existance of friends. What a friend should be. What I should be as a friend in the coming days and years. I may not help anything with the obstacles my friends are encountering. But what I can give maybe something more (which means a lot to them at there weakest days) - support, exisitance, accompany.
5. 作主喜悅的事
Thu 16 Mar 14:16
Glad that things are over. (Should be) And I hope that by drawing the line on this case, there's nothing I have to worry and work on the same thing again before my graduation. In the past weeks, I have as much thoughts and ideas as I could have. I overthought a lot. Couldn't have a proper, stressless sleep. However, I learnt a huge lesson or like a serval lessons throughout the whole case.
1. It's better working my whole ass on something without relying on people too much or to let them to do my job, and to get a grade or reward that I deserve to have.
2. To be honest to myself, to God, to the Holy Spirit.
3. 若要人不知，除非己莫為。漢·枚乘 《上書諫吳王》
4. Friends. The meaning or the existance of friends. What a friend should be. What I should be as a friend in the coming days and years. I may not help anything with the obstacles my friends are encountering. But what I can give maybe something more (which means a lot to them at there weakest days) - support, exisitance, accompany.
5. 作主喜悅的事
Thu 16 Mar 14:16
2017年3月7日 星期二
A little update on 7 March
It has been the most intensed period so far in the past 2 weeks. Things and tasks (both mentally and psyically) just come to me when I was least expected. Things and responsibilies are just unstoppable so what I can do to cut my stress level is to focus on each task so I can tackle them one by one... However, I can certainly say that I have learnt a lot yet experienced lots of His grace under all these pressures and emotions. Things can't be done in these ways without His work.
要 常 常 喜 樂 ．
不 住 的 禱 告 ．
凡 事 謝 恩 ． 因 為 這 是 神 在 基 督 耶 穌 裡 向 你 們 所 定 的 旨 意 。
不 要 銷 滅 聖 靈 的 感 動 ．
不 要 藐 視 先 知 的 講 論 ．
但 要 凡 事 察 驗 ． 善 美 的 要 持 守 。
各 樣 的 惡 事 要 禁 戒 不 作 。
帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-22
Tue 7 Mar 22:37
要 常 常 喜 樂 ．
不 住 的 禱 告 ．
凡 事 謝 恩 ． 因 為 這 是 神 在 基 督 耶 穌 裡 向 你 們 所 定 的 旨 意 。
不 要 銷 滅 聖 靈 的 感 動 ．
不 要 藐 視 先 知 的 講 論 ．
但 要 凡 事 察 驗 ． 善 美 的 要 持 守 。
各 樣 的 惡 事 要 禁 戒 不 作 。
帖撒羅尼迦前書 5:16-22
Tue 7 Mar 22:37
2017年2月21日 星期二
Smth worth to make it down
Auntie Greta drove down to Nottingham to sign my BNO and have a quick lunch with me. I didn't expect that this short meet up could inspire me and remind me that much.
From time to time when I asked questions about AG's past, she would instantly said '咁又要講耶穌啦'. She said that she is a real testimony or example of how God use a woman who is not good at studying or have no specific goal at all. She keeps emphasised that it's all in God - the day she decided to study nursing, to be a midwife, how God knows her and keep her in different 'safe' department and how did God place her in the right department in the field. She said at the right timing, God will give you and lead you to the place where He would like to put you. There's nothing not in Him when we allow God to work in our life. What a huge faith in God :')
AG didn't just come from London to sign for my BNO, but more, she shares her life experiences and how she cast her worries and anxieties to God :) She told me and kept reminding me to do so. And I can see when we the human are willing to keep our eyes on God, God knows that we have faith in Him and He will grant peace and blessings in our everyday life. As simple as that. As blessed as that :')
Amen. You always always always talk to me and remind me at the right timing. Never too late or too early for that :')
Tue 21 Feb 14:27
Tue 21 Feb 14:27
2017年1月26日 星期四
Back to Nottingham 2017 | 26 Jan 13:55
Um, just feel like coming back a bit. Life 2017 in Nottingham starts again. I was welcomed by Henry and Ashluk at the train station on 24th and they made 'Robert cake' :) Just feel like living with people and having friends who care are not a bad thing at all like originally I was planning what to make in head when I was on the train.
Ytd was a productive day which I called it a 成功人士day. Woke at 10ish, made breakfast, gym, went to Henry's for coffee and catch up w/ Ray, backed home for lego time and Sherlock, lastly dinner and surprise time at my place for Marco's bday. Glad that Marco is so high and happy whole night. I was too tired that I slept w/ my make up & unbrushed teeth.
- He came up to celebrate Marco's bday as well and we didn't have much contact at all. Hope things will get better and better when time gone by. As there are too less time for hate-tress and too less time for love.
26 Jan 14:01
Ytd was a productive day which I called it a 成功人士day. Woke at 10ish, made breakfast, gym, went to Henry's for coffee and catch up w/ Ray, backed home for lego time and Sherlock, lastly dinner and surprise time at my place for Marco's bday. Glad that Marco is so high and happy whole night. I was too tired that I slept w/ my make up & unbrushed teeth.
- He came up to celebrate Marco's bday as well and we didn't have much contact at all. Hope things will get better and better when time gone by. As there are too less time for hate-tress and too less time for love.
26 Jan 14:01
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